The Reality Of It All; I Am Not A Socialist; I Don't Care To Explain

I am not a vampire, but in all reality I just might be. At least by post modern standards.
Health care reform is being pushed massively at this point, people crying out for this panel which decides who gets health care and who doesn't instead of it lying in corporate hands. They believe people that actually care will be on these panels. They believe it will no longer be about money if we only change it this way. The reality of it all is it won't change. The same jerk heading up that corporation who looks for reasons to cancel your insurance will be, or eventually will be, a part of the panel who can "justly and graciously" decide who gets health insurance and who does not. How can people get so caught up they do not see the motives and outcomes are the same? The reality of it all... is people never get it, at least not as a whole.
So I suppose it is time to focus on how we can help each other. Even if health care does fail if we ALL focus on the needs of others we ALL always be supported. In that case, I sure hope Christ comes back soon.

There Is No Walking The Other Way, That's Just The Way It Is

I am... a vocal person. Hardly ever is there something crossing my path not worth speaking about or, if God wills, into. But my voice rarely lies in my words. If for a moment it does I almost feel as if I had an out of body experience. No, my voice resides in my glance, my stare, my heart, my vision, my soul... in my God. Ever has He spoken for me so now He has become my voice.
I am convinced (I love Paul) people cannot be swayed more than by a person who has conviction through doubt. Not someone who hangs on because of obligation, but because in their mind, heart, and soul there simply is no other option. Despite imperfections, that small part of them that holds fast in a world of doubt and voracious, ravenous hunger to consume all that we are, is a more powerful witness than 1,000 missionaries. If only we could all find the truth causing us to cling amongst the clouds.
Anyway, good song. Read. Listen.

Your Love Is Better Than Life (St. Petersberg Mix)
by
The Newsboys

I dunno nothing that I haven't been taught
I dunno why I was born into the family I've got
I dunno if I ever had an original thought
Maybe not, maybe so, maybe later, I dunno

I dunno how I can end a prayer, then turn on a friend
I dunno what I was thinking when I just pressed 'send'
I dunno why I still criticize the things I dunno
I dunno, I dunno, I dunno, but I know

Your love is better than life
Without Your love, I'm just a broken machine
Your love is better than life
Without Your love, it's just a mindless routine
Your love is better than life
Without Your love, I'm in another free fall
Your love is better than life
Without Your love, I've got nothing at all

I dunno what goes down the moment we die
Do we get halos and harps?
Do we sleep?
Do we fly?
I dunno how, when and why this world will finally end
Speculation's gonna grow
Who knows best?
I dunno

I dunno if I should push ahead or stop and grieve
I lie awake and wonder how to make a city believe
I dunno when it's a ministry and when it's a show
Maybe neither, maybe both, I dunno
But this one thing I know

Your love is better than life
Without Your love, I'm just a broken machine
Your love is better than life
Without Your touch, I'm not a full human being
Your love is better than life
If I should ever leave, where would I go?
Your love is better than life
I look to You, 'cause You're the lover of my soul

Here's to the lover of my soul

I dunno when to walk away or stand and fight
Just when I've got it wrong, I'm sure I heard You right
And when my arguments are water-tight
You expose every hole with a flash and a flood
And I know I hear You call in the eye of the storm
And I know You've had my back since the day I was born
Still stoking my heart, still stirring my head
You'r emy pillar of fire, You're the wine, You're the bread

And Your love is better than life
Without Your love, I'm in another free fall
Your love is better than life
Without Your love, I've got nothing at all

I dunno when I've got it right or wrong
I dunno how I can wrap it in a four-minute song
But I know my grip is better when I'm not hanging on
Your love is making us strong, all along
Your love is better than life.

Dried Apricots

Warning: Dialogue in this blog has been somewhat modified for grammatical and all around it-just-sounds-better-that-way purposes. (And I am the italics = D)

In the past week I have consumed more hot chocolate than I have in the past year. Really it makes me sick, yet I crave it nonetheless.
I like being at the top of the food chain. Not even a Tyrannosaurus Rex could eat me. The other night while taking a quick jaunt outside with Whitney, I saw a squished... animal on the ground. It appeared to be a slug (which are often laid open on the cement) so I continued on my merry way. It was then my friend exclaimed, "That was a slug?! But it had legs!"
What?! Rushing back to the scene because I could not leave the smashed, legged creature's identity a mystery, I peered down onto the street, studying the gutless roadkill. After much deliberation it was decided. A frog!
Naturally feeling terrible, I searched for a resting grounds for the poor creature. Whitney protested.
"What are you doing?!"
Finding a place to put it. We can't just leave it in the street.
*rolls eyes and turns away*
Where should I put it?
"I don't know!"
After some more much needed deliberation the frog went back to its original death bed. The people whose garden I could have used were sitting on their porch and I could not very well walk around with a dead frog dangling from one leg, skin empty and head sagging. But it still should have at least been thrown in the nearest possible yard.
"You are putting it back? Then why did you... never mind."
It appeared our walk would continue until this slug the size of Texas caught my eye.
Woah! As I approached something changed. Were those pinchers? God in heaven! That is a crawdad!
Of course my friend standing over there was absolutely oblivious to the what actually lurked in front of us, so I ran over and picked it up. Spinning around with my new found friend, I held him proudly in the air.
It's a crawdad! In the middle of the street!
To make a long story short, evidence leads to the frogs murder by said crawdad, and while I had no punishment set aside, evidence also suggests Fatty (my kitty) raided the pot where Mr. Murderer resided and took responsibility of Judge, Jury, and Executioner all in one.
And in all of this, aside from my amazement that a crawdad was sitting in the middle of the street with no water or creek in the vicinity, I gained one jewel of thought: I am overjoyed I am at the top of the food chain. It is just one more reason to praise God every day. Really guys, in all seriousness... Praise the Lord.

As I Write Another Draft And I Toss It In The Trash... (Sometimes Called "Speaking Of")

It seems just last week I cleaned out all my drafts... now I have about 6 or 7 more. Wait, it was just last week I cleaned them out. Crap. All these things fly around in my head and find no peace. So I try to write them down, soon realizing I need to study up on a couple things to finish it. Then I get studying all this random stuff and, well, I just lose track of its container. You know, that place where all the information is stored? When those get lost I can't focus on anything. Good thing God has been gracious enough to teach me patience. At least a few things can get written down.
Today I was reminded. I am not sure of what, but I was reminded. It made me feel closer to God. Like in one of those pictures where couples hold each other in their arms and smile at the camera. That is my favorite feeling to have with God. He knows me so well that all those questions that try to steal my faith and hope become obsolete. His love is so powerful.
Speaking of faith and hope, I heard a really good sermon on them the other day. The pastor expressed faith was what we have in things past and hope is what we have in things future. For a quick, easy example, Christ's accomplishment is what we have faith in and heaven is what we hope in. It isn't the kind of hope like, "I hope this works out..." It is the kind that says, "I am sure of my place in heaven." I am no scholar or Biblical teacher by any means, but it appears to me this is accurate. Even in the little things you see in the Bible, in history, in life can equate to this formula of faith and hope. Learning new things makes me happy.
Speaking of happy, I feel extra accomplished right now. But after trying to pin why I feel this way on so many things, I have decided to just let God take the blame for it. He has (and continues to) grown me in so many ways I could never begin to describe the joy that is present in Him. Is this the reason for sparkles?
There are so many things that wish to be said, yet no way to say them. Guess I will need to act. Funny thing about faith and hope. They all require action. They must be facilitated by the willing, faith-giving, hoping, wanting, shattered, humbled, acting heart. These are the stepping stones to a joyous life in Christ.
Speaking of joy, I am really craving a good worship with music and some friends...
I know what I was reminded of now. Listening. I see myself listening. To God... and to others. I pray they will talk.